More than a little self-conscious
by Jennifer Greene-Sullivan
October 1, 2025
Today, I had a wonderful day at Greene Acres Farm’s Home School Day, where I set up with all my books from Jubilee Junction. Jessica and Leigh Ann were so sweet and even took pictures of me before all the families came through.
Well, here’s the thing—while the day was amazing, I felt self-conscious about those photos. Why? Because I am always upset about my five double chins. In my mind, I’m graceful, attractive, maybe even debonair. In reality, I’ve fallen off the weight-loss wagon one too many times and apparently landed right on my neck. 😂
So, inspired by my glamorous five-chin photo session, I present to you:
How to Lose Your Five Double Chins in 10 Days
Day 1: Look at the pictures your sweet friends took and gasp. Loudly. This burns calories. (Or so I tell myself.)
Day 2: Convince yourself that drinking water is the cure. Chug three bottles, then notice your chins are now hydrated and glowing.
Day 3: Stand with perfect posture, chin high. Unfortunately, this makes you look like a surprised pelican.
Day 4: Try TikTok’s “face yoga.” Spend 45 minutes stretching your neck like a confused llama. Family deeply concerned.
Day 5: Vow to only eat salad. Accidentally put blackened chicken on top. With sweet onion sauce. And cheese. And honey mustard the size of Texas.
Day 6: Laugh about it with friends. Remind yourself laughter is cardio. By that logic, you’re basically an athlete.
Day 7: Master the “selfie angle.” Suddenly, you look like a supermodel. (Never mind that you had to hold your phone three feet above your head while standing on tiptoe.)
Day 8: Consider Spanx for your chin. Realize this is called a “scarf.” Own it.
Day 9: Tell everyone you’re just saving neck space for the winter. It’s not extra weight—it’s insulation.
Day 10: Accept your five chins as part of your fabulous self. Because here’s the secret: everyone else just sees your smile, your books, and the joy you bring. And joy is the best weight-loss plan of all. 💕
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The Aging English Major 